I spent some time at mums this weekend where we have been getting out some Christmas decorations and putting up Christmas trees. Dad will not be around this year and with us losing him at the beginning of this year and him becoming unwell last Christmas with his last pint being on Christmas eve in a pub out with me and his last full meal being on Chirstmas day it will be da different sort of feel to Christmas.
Mum’s tree in officeMums main tree in homeTwo little fellas fresh out of their box
When I got home this afternoon I decorated my first tree in my own home. I wanted to do it this year as with things being different so I fancied a change myself and getting a tree putting it up and decorated it will bring a little Christmas cheer into my home though it won make up for the storm clouds we faced last year.
This time last year me and Dad were on holiday in Ireland for St Patricks day, thanks to a bet that I won on the horse the day after Christmas 2023. It was an unexpected win for a number of reasons and so when the bet paid out I shared some of the money with my mum and dad as the money did not really feel like mine anyway.
Dad said that rather than have the cash he wanted to go on holiday to Ireland and so that is exactly what we did. I paid for the accommodation and flights and we shared the costs of the meals and drinks. It was so much fun and went to some new places that I had not visited before as well as some tried and tested places. We initially got a ferry over from south Wales, which very nearly did not happen to County Wexford, then stayed in lovely hotel there and then travelled to Cork where dads Nan was from. We then went up to Limerick and onto Galway where we spent a weekend and was in St Patricks day for the Sunday. Finally we headed back to Dublin for a few days and then caught a flight back home. I love Ireland; I love my family and feel like although I am missing my Dad now that he is no longer with us I am very grateful for the time we shared together.
I feel like I am counting my blessings at present rather than counting my curses and there are many blessings. Though I hoped and thought he would live longer the time we all shared with him was special and I feel honoured to have known him and had him as part of my life.
Is this year nearly over yet! So sadly on Friday 31st January my father sadly passed away in hospital after a short battle with cancer and other complications in his body he was just 73 which feels still so young. He was very ill in his last month of life although it was a pleasure and honour to spend time around him even at this difficult time. I was trying to do a little bit of everything, visit him in hospital, continue to work and also look after myself.
January was a tough month and more so for my Dad than anyone of us. In his time in hospital he also had a bleed on the brain which led to confusion and considerable forgetfulness, which made communication difficult at times. We hoped he could be cured of the diagnosed cancer but also had a considerable fear that this he was dying.
One of the most heartfelt and warm, comforting things Dad has ever said to me was, while he was lying on his hospital bed he said after I told him that I was trying to do a little bit of everything and failing to do them all well. He told me that I had failed at nothing, which was just so beautiful and in his moment of need and support he was their supporting me and making me feel so very proud of him being my Dad.
I was able to let many people know on Facebook that he had passed away and the love and support people have posted has been a huge comfort for which me, mum and Shamen are very grateful for.
Me and his partner Shamen will be meeting with the funeral director tomorrow and we have hopes and plans for what we would like to do for my Dads funeral. Which I will update more information on here as and when it has been planed or taken place.
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