Category: Life

I have been asked to Shield at Home

Along with an Extra 1.7 million people in England I have been asked to shield at home starting from today. So no more trips to work, the shops or the pharmacy or meeting up with people outside or inside of my home or theirs home.

I have been working full time with 2 days at home and 3 days in the office each week. But yesterday I received a letter from the NHS that said that due to putting new evidence into a risk model with information the NHS already holds, I have now been identified as being someone who might be at high risk of catching and becoming seriously unwell with Coronoavirus.

So I am now classed as being in a high risk category and am now formerly known as clinically extremely vulnerable. People in my category are now currently advised by the government to shield and stay at home as much as possible until 31st March or Be Free Day as I might get use to calling it.

This is so surreal, The whole covid-19 pandemic has been so surreal and I have done my best to aim to obey the rules and do the right thing and follow advice throughout the pandemic but I kind of did it hoping to prevent an infection for a vulnerable person or people not realising I was that ‘clinically extremely vulnerable person myself’!

I do not know for sure because the letter did not make me feel worse by telling me what my risk factors were but I can mainly assume it is a combination of my newly diagnosed diabetes, age, weight and blood sugar levels along with my past mental health difficulties for which I still take medication for.

With regards to my physical health and diabetes diagnosis I had already put measures in place to try to do my best to reduce my diabetes risks as I have been following a new food regime which has resulted in me losing at least 0.5 stone or 3.5kg over the space of a few weeks and I was already very motivated to continue with this new food plan.

Sunday lunch with less roast and more veg!

It is a very simple plan. No snacking, having a sweet or desert only with a meal and weighing my portions or rice, pasta and potatoes instead of just bunging them on a plate like I used to. This plan does seem to be working for me and when I want to have a snack I just have a drink instead.

I am due to have my first phone assessment with a diabetes dietician next week where she can look over what I am doing and hopefully provide me with any hints or tips too.

The diagnosis of diabetes is something that has been hanging over me for years and now finally having it has been a call to arms for my mind and body to really try and focus on losing weight and getting my blood sugars back under control.

Managing diabetes, my weight and blood sugars is going to be an ongoing fight for me now and knowing that I am now described as clinically extremely vulnerable at the age of 45 possibly due to physical and mental health issues is a wakeup call and call to arms to hopefully sort my shit out!

I am also due to get my Covid-19 vaccine jab this Saturday which is one of the reasons I am still allowed to leave the house so that can but only be good news too.

Birdy – Keeping Your Head Up

WW2 bomb detonated in Exeter

A 400m cordon was set up before the bomb – which was 1,000kg heavy, around 2.5m in length, and would have fallen from a Nazi bomber in 1942 – was detonated at about 6.10pm on Saturday 27th February. I could hear the explosion from my house which sounded like a firework going off when they detonated it. Social media in Exeter went a bit crazy as well with reports of what was happening from peoples homes at the time of the detonation.

One friend commented on his FaceBook site about the bomb going off, only to have people that did not know what was happening jump on him, saying that there were no bombs in Exeter and they certanly were not being detonated that night (little did they know).

The news that the bomb had been discovered at first broke on Friday 25th February it was found on a buidling site probably for new student accomodation as that is what most buildings sites are for in Exeter or so the locals would have you believe, this site was just by the university. My boss was one the people that had to go on site throughout the weekend and other staff were also called upon to assist during the weekend.

The video below is an edit of a classic 1960’s film scene called the Italian Job with Michel Cain and the actual expolsion in Exeter edited together.

It was a bloody big explosion on site with many properties being damaged close by. Though fortunaly no one was injured and properties are being checked for damage and people being provided ongoing support.

More than 2,600 households and University of Exeter halls of residence were evacuated after the device was found on Glenthorne Road on Friday.

Police declared a major incident and put up an initial 100m (330ft) cordon, extended to 400m (1,310ft).

Bomb disposal experts used 400 tonnes of sand to create an enclosing “box” before it was made safe at 18:12 GMT.

About 1,400 students were evacuated from 12 halls of residence after the explosive was found by builders on private land next to the Streatham campus at about 09:20 GMT on Friday.

The bomb evacuation zone in Exeter Pictured above

Police said bomb disposal crews “worked through the night to establish a walled mitigation structure” and they had been expecting “a big bang” to be heard “quite a distance across Exeter” during the operation to make it safe.

Any residents who have been directly affected who are in need of support should phone the helpline on 01392 265000. The line is open form 9am to 5pm.

Oh Brother Where Art Thou?

O Brother, Where Art Thou (2000) Soundtrack – Down to the River to Pray

The 28th February 2021 will be 6 years to the day since we lost my brother to him taking his own life on Saturday in 2015. In the early hours of the morning the young warrior was slain, and it was his own hand that pulling his trigger too. So I am the last of my parent’s children and our line could die with me although my brothers son still lives and god willing he might one day have a family of his own and continue my brothers blood line, but he does not feel like he is really anything to do with our family and grows further away from us as each year passes by and his interest or even belief that he is part of this family diminishes over time.

My bro with his beloved dog Sam

I have cousins both on my mothers and fathers side of the family that are fantastic breeders and wonderful people. But alas I truly feel that in all realistic ways my time and chances of having a family of my own and a grandchild or grandchildren for my parents is all but gone. It would have helped if I had been in a relationship long enough to ask a lover to marry me, but having not had that many relationships in my lifetime I have no idea if I could father a child let alone be a good father. I am also insanely shy, when it comes to asking women out on dates and that shyness results in me having been single for the vast majority of my life.

Me and Andy on a trip to France

People don’t really see me as a shy person but with layers and coping mechanisms I have been able to hide it well for many years and my coping mechanisms and tricks, really do help me get by in this crazy world and I feel like I have found people, friends acquaintances and colleagues who like me and I like them too which makes me feel comfortable and at ease in my own skin.  

As I have mentioned to some on here before, my brother was a very spiritual man and he believed that he had a spirit guide that was a Native American spirit guide that communicated with him from the spirit world and I believe this perception of reality that my brother held to be true. My brother Andy was tremendously strong willed, a successful charmer of the ladies and a luckily and driven man. His main flaw was he had no ability to take care of money, but saying that he knew how to take care of people. But ultimately the only person that could beat him at this game of life was himself, when he decided to end his life in one ill tempered moment in time the same zeal and motivation that had fuelled his desire to live tragically resulted in him motivating himself to take his own life.

My Bro Andy

At first when writing this blog page I did not know whether it was appropriate to write on here out of respect for my brother and parents but as it is already on the web from a newspaper article from after his inquest I feel ok to say on here that unfortunately my brother shot himself in what was described by the coroner and those that were there at the time of his death, as a moment of madness. Hence his determination to live life to the full and do what he wanted to do or what he thought was right was twisted and turned on its head at the end of his life and he used his determination and will to sadly take his own life. One of his then partners children who was then only about 18 herself was wrestling a gun off him on this most wicked of nights along with one of my brothers good friends who was also trying to get the gun off him, only to have Andy run into his bedroom where he grabbed a second gun and ended his own life then. This would be the first and last time he would try to take his own life.

It makes you question everything when a life event like this happens or when any life that you love is suddenly taken away, where was/is god? Why did Andy do this to himself? Why did God or even Andy’s spirit guide let this happen? I very quickly and with some anger inside as well as sadness at first blamed my brother for he was the one that pulled the dam trigger.

But blame does not make the hurt go away and does not stop you from loving a person or asking the question why did he do that? The moment of madness ruling by the judge is all we will really ever have to go on. I know we will meet again one day, but hopefully after I am much older than I am now and we can both laugh ourselves silly looking back at mistakes in life that I have yet to even make yet or laugh at funny situations that I have gotten into and continue to get myself into in my life as well as the funny and wonderful situations we shared when he was alive.

An Andy Smile

Most good spirited people in this world seem to have a good and kindly nature and sense of humour, and a unique and positive outlook on life and good way at looking at life and putting a spin on life’s events, situations and settings. I like to think I have one of those perspectives too and my brother had one also and last but not least the most awesome walking spiritual dude on this planet , His Holiness the 14th Dalai Lama of Tibet has one of those positive perspectives on life, (a fellow spiritual person whom is also a singleton you know). My point being is that you have to see the good in people, the laughs in life and have a hunger to continue to want more out of this crazy world in order to find inspiration for a million and 1 ways and reasons to continue to fight the good fight.  

If a job’s worth doing, it’s worth doing well

Or Money for nothing and contracts millions given to friends and party donors for free.

I normally don’t get my news from Facebook but today a meme was doing the rounds about the lack of news on an important story.

Matt Hancock the UK Health Minister has been found guilty of not disclosing NHS contracts to the UK public. Now at first you might think well he had a lot of other stuff to do, with say saving the population and all that. But the more you dig into the news (or lack of news item the worse it gets).

The Government unlawfully failed to publish details of billions of pounds’ worth of coronavirus-related contracts, the High Court has ruled.

There looks to be a battle at the heart of government to not give money to local councils and health services for fear of waste and not trusting them to do the jobs they are they are there to do. Or for fear of them doing such a good job they might end up asking for even more money or powedr and control.

Prior to the pandemic we have been force fed for many years the lie that spending money on public health, local government and public service should be cut back, year on year for it is never affordable or practical to spend money on others and not really needed and civilisation itself might even collapse and our capitalist way of life grind to a halt if we try in any way what so ever to fairly fund government services with tax payers money.

Then a real crisis comes along in the shape of the pandemic, which results in a very real scenario of civilisations being put to the test and grinding to a halt and suddenly were all bloody socialist regardless of where you stand on the political spectrum, spending money as a left-winger, centralists or even right-winger on life saving society enhancing services and treatments is now seen as a normal way to do  business..

Huwspace.com Website Birthday

It’s exactly one year to the day since the first article was born on this website.

I was reminiscing last night about different types of communication platforms or social media sites that I have followed or used in the past and also wondered why I used them and if or how they used me.

The reason I mention whether they have used me or whether I am using them is that on social media platforms such as Facebook and MySpace you sometimes feel more like you are the product or thing that is being promoted or sold. Where as on a website blog because I control and editing and content of it it feels like I have more ownership over it.

The first website I really enjoyed using was MySpace. It was an amazing platform for sharing music, finding like minded people and also having as a platform for political and ethical activism. The way people shared ideas and raised awareness concerning different issues and ideas really was inspirational and at its peak I do believe it was purchased by Rupert Murdock because of its ability to empower individuals to educate one another to inform and share ideas. To someone like Rupert Murdock such a platform of sharing ideas and ethics was a dangerous thing that was to be bought, sold and suppressed. Someone like him feared and would try to buy and stop a form of communication that might threatened the consensus or shattered what was seen as the norm of political and ethical thinking by the so called rich, great and good defined by corporate media. A platform where people can educate themselves and no longer need to be told what their opinions are because they are too busy thinking for themselves could be feared by some people within power.

We should always aim to speak truth to power – for one day we might be the difference between the worst happening and preventing it from happening.

Man versus Tank – Tiananmen square 5th June 1989

That is what I really like about having a blog, I am my own editor and hopefully those that are reading the published pages are doing so because they want to see what I have been upto or heaven forbid what I might even have to say.  

I really never thought I would have enough to say to be able to do a blog. But once those fingers start tapping away on a keyboard, it can sometimes be that I have too much to say and must try to keep it relevant and to the point.

Being dyslexic also means I am not a fan or find large pages of words difficult to read sometimes and my grammar and spelling are also not great. When I was a child I loved visual mediums such as Cinema, TV and cartoons. But I was not a fan of books and really struggled to try and read books from page to page let alone cover to cover. If I struggled to connect with a book I would find that I could not remember what I was reading at the top of a page once I had gotten to the bottom. Where as with films, TV episodes or cartoons I found them much more memorable and felt more emotionally connected to them than word on a page.

Eddie The Gun – Don’t Be Afraid

Saying that though one thing I do and did love was creative writing trying to build emotional images and stories though words. I am quite an emotional human and so feelings and emotions are part of this human journey and so trying to connect with people and share my morals perceptions of right and wrong with others and also learning what other people’s views of right and wrong are is a fascinating journey that WordPress helps me to continue to travel along. So happy 1 year birthday to this website I hope you have many more birthdays and I look forward to sharing ideas and reading articles and blogs from other fellow WordPress writers too.  

My Coronavirus antibody test results

A grim reaper of a covid milestone

Today the UK marked a grim reaper of a covid-19 milestone. We recoded over 100,000 people that had tested positive with Covid-19 prior to their deaths that then went on to die. One hundred thousand people are such a large amount of people that it is almost unimaginable. As a teenager in high school  we had a large sports hall that could fit around 1000 pupils in it for an assembly, so that is a way I could try and visualise the amount of people being 100 high school sports halls of people having died because of this terrible virus.

So far I think on a personal level I have not been as severely affected as many, many people have. I hope that that continues to be the case. I am not a huge social butterfly and so I don’t miss going out that much although it does feel like life is on hold sometimes.

With work I still get out to the office 3 days a week and so that is still taking place although I prefer working from home to going into the office.

I live on my own and covid-19 has not changed that I enjoy my own company and through new digital platforms such as this have continued to express myself and feel like I am doing something constructive or real. But it often just feels like I am typing a diary to myself for my memories and forget or don’t worry too much that others might read this too.  

I received a letter from the National Health Service a couple of weeks ago asking if I wanted to sign up to take a coronavirus blood test which will try and determine if I have had covid-19 in the past and whether I have any antibodies to Covid-19. This sounded really interesting and important research to help with so I signed up and got my testing kit today.

So I did the test not 100% sure if I made a mistake when doing it (which I told them about when feeding my results back). It looks like it might have come back as positive for having had it in the past, but I would prefer to take a second test to be sure.

I volunteered to have my test results shared with the NHS and also for them to be able to access and monitor my health results for the next 20 years should they need to, I am in no way paranoid about giving them access to my records and not that I need to but I am sure I could withdraw my consent at any time should I change my mind.

I thought I might have had a serious case of flue last January which I always thought could have been covid-19 and this test result simply backs up that case. I hope to not have again what I had then. It was the mental side effects that unrolled last year more than the physical that concern me the most.

Having been a person who has experienced severe mental health difficulties in the past and who now takes two tablets a day (possibly for the rest of my life) to prevent things like that happening again or at least to reduce the risks or chances of things like that reacuring. I cannot over state to you the joy of experiencing non negative or even positive mental health days and moments in time.

Amy Macdonald – The Human Demands

A time like no other

It was the worst of times but we have seen the best of many people. A time like we have never known or wish to know again – but how can we ever learn any lessons from times like this and if we do learn what will those lessons be?

I wonder what will be written about how 2020 unfolded when people look back. Although there are lots of ways and reasons to see the bleak black clouds of heartfelt hurt and disappointments I wonder what will be the silver lining of goodness or positivity that might come through this. A little like a blanket of snow drop flowering across a woodland floor bringing in with them the signs of a new season and rejuvination of life after a bitter and harsh winter.

Sometimes how we view and react to a life event shapes how or even if we can move forward from the event. Although at other times it might be the very events themselves  that force us to be re-shaped and review our view of the world or how we see ourselves within it. Coronavirus is very much an event that people have had to react to and or been reshaped by.

Another nice mess

So do we thank or blame god?

Curse or give credit to a politician in power?

Tears for the poltical stage

Or will we be grateful for what we have or curse for what we do not have?

Well in time we will hopefully have an opportunity to find out, reflect and move forward.

Happy Holidays 2020!

Today was my last day in work until Christmas. I now have one week off until I log into my work computer again to do some work and even better than that I managed to get all the work that I hoped to do today done. Presents bought and wrapped, Christmas songs playing on Spotify. Though this Christmas is in no way normal for pretty much everyone.

Merry Christmas 2020 one and all

In a normal year in the week building up to Christmas day I would be out on a Wednesday night like tonight listening to music in a bar exchanging cards, gifts and stories with friends whilst getting merry with a Christmas Guinness or two.

I’m afraid I am not a household drinker of alcohol so lockdown drinking does not really happen for me. I still have four cans of Guinness being kept cool in my fridge that I was given from my workplace for leaving my old job back in July. There is something lovely about a social pint in a bar with friends, family or strangers just does not do when drinking at home on my own. Therefore I just don’t drink alcohol at home alone.

They say people forget what they do when they drink (too much). But for me some of my most cherished memories are from times when I was having a drink with strangers, family or friends.

Back to Christmas!

Gabrielle Aplin – Happy Xmas (War is Over)

In a normal year my bags would be packed now and I would be on the first train out of Exeter to visit my mum to stay with her for Christmas. I even booked the day off work Christmas eve to travel to Cornwall. But we all took the decision not to meet up for Christmas this year and have a catcup around Easter 2021 instead or after Mum has had a vaccination against Covid-19 first and is in a better position to be protected against the virus. After such a difficult time the one thing I did not want to give to either of my parents for Christmas is the risk of bringing Covid-19 to either of my parents, so better to be safe than sorry.

Instead I will be spending Christmas with a friend who also would have been spending it alone in Exeter this year due to his circumstances too, so our social bubble is legal and legit for a Christmas day meal together. He is vegetarian so nearly all of the food I am cooking is vegetarian, all bought and ready to cook. I am really looking forward to it. I even have some Guinness flavoured coffee to get me going on Christmas morning.

Slade – Merry Christmas Everybody

So here it is Merry Christmas from Exeter in the UK its just gone 12 midnight and it is now officially Christmas Eve 2020 here. I look to the future now, its only just begun. I hope you do to.

My year in review or a Huw View!

Well I tried to do a survey on my last post and so far only three people have responded so this time I would be answering the questions myself a sort of summary of 2020 and see how this goes.

One of my favourite songs I have listened to this year Song for Zula by Phosporescent

Question 1. Hardest thing I had to do this year.

Making sure I did not have a complete meltdown and go backwards in life after having a  severe mental health blip at the beginning of the year. Some time back in March I went to A&E with huge concerns for my mental health I think it was a few weeks before the first lock down started. The thing was I had a chest infection and bad cold/flue or covid-19 thing at the beginning of 2020 and it stole from me my ability to sleep properly at night and I kind of slipped into a non sleeping, spaced out and obsessed with Covid-19 taking hold around the world mess.

 I had enough insight to realise that I was unwell,  which is why I went to the hospital.  I managed to have a good talk to the on duty mental health team there and got a lot off my chest about how to move things forward. After four days off work gathering my thoughts and learning how to sleep again I was able to carry on working and kept ticking over until I had recovered from my mental mess more thoroughly.

Questions 2. Greatest achievement of 2020?

Also back in March I went for a job interview for the council working in environmental health and amazingly got offered and accepted the job. The job did not start until July 13th. This was because I needed to be trained up in office in order to learn how to do the job so  was only aloud to start after the first lockdown had finished.

Question 3. Best purchase of 2020?

I went and bought a tree, not just any tree mind you but a book published in 1770 that had a print of Yggdrasil. Yggdrasil (from Old Norse Yggdrasill) is an immense mythical tree that plays a central role in Norse cosmology, where it connects the Nine Worlds.

I did a little research on the print and found out I could by the origianl book with the print in it would cost me less than buying a copy of the print to hang up on my wall straight from a retailer. So I got the book, scanned the image into my computer, then uploaded the scan onto a website that turns scans and photos into pictures to go an walls on canvases and had the picture produced onto a canvas frame and posted to me to go on my wall in my lounge above where I now work for the council when I work at home.

Isn’t it lovely

At the time you could buy this image on eBay as a print for about £60 but the way that I produced it meant I had the original book that the print came from along with the framed print for half the price. A good deal in deed.

Speaking of Trees and life – The tallest tree in Wales had been damaged by a storm and was supposed to be cut down, but a better solution was found. Natural Resource Wales, which was in charge of the site, ordered artist O ‘ Rourke to cut down the tree. He cameup with the concept of carving what the tree stump and trunk into a giant hand – to symbolise the tree’s last attempt to reach the sky. Once completed, the sculpture was coated with tung oil, a natural vegetable oil safe for the closeness of the riverways.

Question 4. Silliest purchase(s) of 2020?

I bought a box load of DVD’s to sell on eBay to raise money for local Exeter charities. At the time their shops were all in lockdown so I thought I would raise some money for them by having online auctions for them on eBay. What could go wrong, well quite a lot actually? I still have boxes of stuff here ready to give away to charity shops as struggled to sell on eBay.

Question 5. Silliest/riskiest thing I did during a lockdown?

I am not a real risk taker most of the time but it’s those times when I do take risks I think later on “what the hell were you thinking” “just don’t bloody do it again”. Well one of those times after the first lockdown had taken place was joining in a drink game with a bunch of people I did not know in a pub that I very much know and enjoy. It only happened once but the next day I was cursing myself with thoughts of “what the hell were you thinking” “just don’t bloody do it again!!”

Question 6. What did I like about this year?

I love nature but I really managed to rediscover nature on my doorstep. When walking the street in spring and early summer at 6am to head to a shop to get a paper and some milk or other supplies, I found that such a magical time to be alive on a clear day the birds sing like they are giving you a personal performance and I even got a bird table to feed the many starlings, fat pigeons and little sparrows that would hop onto my bird table.

Food for thought

Van William – Revolution (Music Video) ft. First Aid Kit

This year has been and continues to be a revolutionary year and for good or ill the revolution continues to go on day by day. Some will win some have lost, some will survive some will not. A lot will live and many will die. Good things have happened and better may come still.  

The fact that I am still here and you the reader are still here is a huge plus for me to.

Happy Christmas to you and yours and best of luck for whatever 2021 throws in your direction.

What is your view?

With over 70 million people in the USA believing in and voting for Trump while the rest of the world looked to Biden with both hope of a new road and feared for another 4 years of Trump this is perhaps a time to not only be looking at what decided the election result but why people vote the way they do.

Amy Winehouse – Rehab

With that in mind I would like to try and conduct a little international political survey asking people what matters to you when you vote. I am genuinely interested in what makes people tick and what issues are high up on your agenda?